Star Wars

Part three of the Super Console Wars saga has arrived, and this time it comes at you in three dimensions. Same console-rivalry nonsense as the first two, only now with things flying out of the screen at your face.

You'll need a pair of red and blue glasses for the full effect. If you don't have any lying around, there's a guide to building a low-rent pair out of things you probably already own, plus a link for getting a free pair if you'd rather let someone else do the work. Either way, it's worth the small amount of effort. Enjoy.

The saga continues, and no, the naming conventions have not improved. GC-PU and VM-U2 slip past the henchmen of the Gamepire and end up stranded on the desert planet Nintendooine, secret plans still in hand. There they fall in with Lukeegi Pipewalker and go looking for Obi-Wan Shinobi, one of the legendary Mascot Knights, who kept the peace in the old Gaming Republic back when they weren't busy being ninjas.

Meanwhile Darth Mario returns to the Gamecube, determined to find the hidden easter egg and put an end to the Mascot Rebellion once and for all.

It is a period of console war. The rebel mascots, striking from an Easter egg, have won their first victory against the evil Gamepire, and the Gamepire has answered with a weapon of terrible power: an armored play station capable of rendering an entire planet in real time.

The stolen plans are aboard Princess Zeia's starship, pursued across the dark by sinister agents, and with them rides the fate of her console and the freedom of gamers everywhere. Part one of a saga nobody demanded, told in the only format the subject deserves.

There is a trailer now, which means Part 2 exists in some real form beyond a folder of clips and a vague plan. That is most of what this post is: the video, and a sentence pointing at it.

No plot summary, no behind the scenes notes, no release date. The trailer does the work a trailer is meant to do, which is to suggest what the finished thing will feel like without explaining how it gets there. If you missed the first part, that is the place to start, and this will make considerably more sense afterward.

Dug out of an old folder and posted exactly as it was made. It is old as dirt, and it looks it: the editing, the music, the pacing, all of it.

Nothing has been cleaned up or re-cut. It seemed better to leave the thing alone than to fix it into something it never was, and old work tends to be more interesting when you let it stay a little embarrassing. So here it is, parked where it can be found again, by anyone who goes looking and by me, the next time I forget it exists. Consider it an artifact more than a trailer.

A trailer, and not a great deal else. Some posts need a paragraph of setup explaining what the thing is and why it exists; this one does not. There is a video, it runs as long as it runs, and it does the explaining better than any amount of writing about it could. Part 1 itself comes later; this is the advance notice.

So press play. If it works on you, you will know soon enough, and if it does not, you have lost less time than you would have spent reading a description of it. Either way, that is the whole post.